Today's Jokes Plus Gay Marriage Opinion Poll

- Here is your ArcaMax Jokes Ezine, sponsored today by: "Do You Think Gay Marriage Should Be Legal In All 50 States?" Go here to give your opinion. Tell us what you think, and we'll enter you into our Monthly Sweepstakes: WIN A $400 ELECTRONIC SHOPPING SPREE from ItsYourOpinion.com! Vote and Enter today
New Book Titles Here's a listing of some recently-published "new books" & their author.... - "How to Write Large Books" by Warren Peace - "The Lion Attacked" by Claude Yarmoff - "The Art of Archery" by Beau N. Arrow - "Irish Heart Surgery" by Angie O'Plasty - "Desert Crossing" by I. Rhoda Camel - "School Truancy" by Marcus Absent - "I Was a Cloakroom Attendant" by Mahatma Coate - "I Lost My Balance" by Eileen Dover and Phil Down - "Mystery in the Barnyard" by Hu Flung Dung - "Positive Reinforcement" by Wade Ago - "Shhh!" by Danielle Soloud - "The Philippine Post Office" by Imelda Letter - "Things to Do at a Party" by Bob Frapples - "Stop Arguing" by Xavier Breath - "Raising Mosquitos" by I. Itch - "Mountain Climbing" by Hugo First
Comment on this Story | Printer Friendly | Send Story to a Friend
Sponsor Test and keep an LCD TV for FREE! Tell us which brand you like best and you could be watching your favorite shows and games on your new HDTV! Choose between Sony, Vizio or Samsung and you'll get to keep your choice for FREE! (Participation Required. See below for details) Click here for details...
Three-Legged Chicken A man was driving along a rural road when he realized he had to make a phone call. He was miles from a pay phone so he decided to stop in at the next farmhouse he found. As he was approaching a house he noticed a three-legged chicken racing along the road. He followed the chicken and clocked it at 45 miles per hour. When the man got to the farmhouse he asked the farmer about the chicken. The farmer replied, "W'all, when I was at the uneeversitee, I studied geenetics. 'Round these parts we love chicken and we're all partial to the drumstick, so I thought I'd see if I could make a three-legged chicken. So, here 'tis." The man was quite impressed. He asked, "How does it taste?" The farmer replied, "Don't know. Ain't none of us been able to catch one yet."
Comment on this Story | Printer Friendly | Send Story to a Friend
Sponsor Use ErrorSmart to Eliminate PC Errors >> Improve your PC's System Speed by Up to 70% Put the industry's most advanced error-resolution technology to work for you. Scan your hard drive, analyze the errors and correct the problems... Get details here   * Increase in PC performance by up to 70 percent.   * Repair DLL Files   * Remove registry errors manually or automatically.   * Added security of registry back-up utilities.   * Easily remove invalid program shortcuts & duplicate files   * Repair of Internet Explorer Errors     ...and more! Free Download Available Here
If College Students Wrote the Bible * The Last Supper would have been eaten the next morning - cold. * The Ten Commandments would actually be only five; double spaced and written in large font. * A new edition would be published every two years in order to limit reselling. * Forbidden fruit would have been eaten because it wasn't cafeteria food. * Paul's letter to the Romans would become Paul's E-mail to abuse@romans.gov. * Reason Cain killed Abel; they were roommates. * Reason why Moses and followers walked the desert for 40 years; they didn't want to ask directions and look like freshmen. * Instead of God creating the world in six days and resting on the seventh, he would have put it off until the night before it was due and then pulled an all-nighter.
Comment on this Story | Printer Friendly | Send Story to a Friend
Sponsor Great coffee tastes even better with a great offer! Try Gevalia now and get 3 boxes of Gevalia coffee for just $3 with FREE SHIPPING! Order today and you'll receive a FREE travel mug! There is NO obligation. Keep the gifts even if you don't continue to enjoy our direct delivery program. GET ALL THIS FOR $3 plus FREE SHIPPING! Click here...
Paying the Bill After doctors set my broken arm and put a cast on it, I paid the bill and went on my way. Shortly thereafter, I received a bill from the hospital, this time for the $1.57 they claimed I still owed. Apparently to prove that this was a hospital with heart, they included a payment book. It had me paying 3 cents a month for four years.
Comment on this Story | Printer Friendly | Send Story to a Friend
Wine and Dine Daily Video Learn to make chocolate cupcakes with buttercream frosting, spring rolls, and even a classic mint julep. They're all easy with free videos from ArcaMax's new Wine and Dine Video Ezine! Every day, this ezine will help you get creative with everything from appetizers to after-dinner cocktails. It even includes video profiles of restaurants and cooks from around the country. Subscribe to the Wine and Dine Video Ezine instantly. Find out more before subscribing. -- From the ArcaMax editors
To see more Jokes, visit the Jokes channel.
ArcaMax proudly distributes 75 popular newsletters, including Garfield, Recipes, Bible Verses, Gardening and Business Success. To Subscribe to any of our Newsletters visit: http://www.arcamax.com/cgi-bin/reg ArcaMax publications are now available in an "advertising-free" format. Click here for details. We invite you to visit BookDaily: Book Samples for Book Lovers
Thank you for your subscription to Jokes from ArcaMax with the following email address: duncanjax@gmail.com Jokes from ArcaMax may be non-commercially distributed unedited! Please share it! Pass it along to friends, family and associates. SUBSCRIBING To Subscribe to any of our Newsletters visit: http://www.arcamax.com/cgi-bin/reg UNSUBSCRIBING To discontinue this newsletter - Select this link Having Trouble? You may also try this link: http://www.arcamax.com/unsubscribe It is our policy and practice not to send unwanted email. ArcaMax Publishing, Inc. 729 Thimble Shoals Boulevard Suite B Newport News, VA 23606 Copyright 1996-2009 ArcaMax Publishing, Inc. All Rights Reserved. All registered trademarks are the property of their respective owners.