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You've been programming too long when - When you are counting objects, you go "0,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,A,B,C,D...". - When asked about a bus schedule, you wonder if it is 16 or 32 bits. - When your wife says "If you don't turn off that darn machine and come to bed,then I am going to divorce you!", and you chastise her for for omitting the else clause. - When you are reading a book and look for the space bar to get to the next page. - When you look for your car keys using: "grep keys /dev/pockets" - When after fooling around all day with routers etc, you pick up the phone and start dialing an IP number. - When you get in the elevator and double-press the button for the floor you want. - When not only do you check your email more often than your paper mail, but you remember your {network address} faster than your postal one. - When you go to balance your checkbook and discover that you're doing the math in octal. - When you dream in 256 pallettes of 256 colors.
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Half The Job "This little computer," said the sales clerk, "will do half of your job for you." Studying the machine, the senior VP said, "Fine, I'll take two."
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Marriage Quotes "My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met." Rodney Dangerfield "When a man brings his wife flowers for no reason, there's a reason." Molly McGee "Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted a whole day." Mickey Rooney "In olden times, sacrifices were made at the altar, a practice that still continues." Helen Rowland "Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that." Unknown "I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry." Rita Rudner
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Email Anonymous - You wake up at 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom and stop to check your e-mail on the way back to bed. - You turn off your modem and get this awful empty feeling, as if you just pulled the plug on a loved one. - You spend half of the plane trip with your laptop on your lap...and your child in the overhead compartment. - You start using smileys in your snail mail. - You find yourself typing "com" after every period when using a word processor.com - You refer to going to the bathroom as downloading. - You can't call your mother...she doesn't have a modem. - You check your mail. It says "no new messages." So you check it again. - You don't know what gender three of your closest friends are because they have neutral screen names and you never bothered to ask. - You tell the cab driver you live at http://1000.edison.garden/house/brick.html - You start tilting your head sideways to smile :)
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