| - Here is your ArcaMax Jokes Ezine, sponsored today by: DON'T BLEACH Single mom discovers 1 simple trick to turn
yellow teeth white from home for less than $3
Learn More DON'T Let the Dentist Fool You Learn the trick, discovered by a mom
to turn yellow teeth white from home
Find Out How! | |
| Broken Engagement Dear Marty,
I have been unable to sleep since I broke off your engagement to my daughter. Will you forgive and forget?
I was much too sensitive about your Mohawk, tattoo and pierced nose. I now realize motorcycles aren't really that dangerous, and I really should not have reacted that way to the fact that you have never held a job.
I am also very sure that some other very nice people live under the bridge in the park, too. Sure my daughter is only 18 and wants to marry you instead of going to Harvard on full scholarship. After all, you can't learn everything about life from books.
I sometimes forget how backward I can be. I was wrong. I was a fool. I have now come to my senses and you have my full blessing to marry my daughter.
Sincerely, Your future father-in-law.
P.S. Congratulations on winning the lottery!
|
| Comment on this Story | Printer Friendly | Send Story to a Friend |
| Sponsor Hitler's Germany: The World at War
The ultimate visual history of World War II From North Africa to Stalingrad, D-Day, Iwo Jima, and Japan.
Experience hours of footage once deemed too shocking for
the public eye. Unseen video collected from the archives
of 18 nations. Order now and never look at WWII the same again! |
| Church Etiquette A Sunday school teacher asked her little children, as they were on the way to church service,
"And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?"
One bright little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping." |
| Comment on this Story | Printer Friendly | Send Story to a Friend |
| Sponsor Make your internet experience more rewarding by getting
paid daily for trying your favorite products and services. Our 100% FREE website, SendEarnings, will reward you instantly
for taking surveys and trying everyday items. Plus if you
get started today, we'll bonus you $3! Here is what makes SendEarnings great...
- Get paid online through Paypal or request a Check by mail
- 24/7 customer service
- Lots of chances to earn cash So what are you waiting for?
Join now and start receiving cash INSTANTLY |
| Tracking the Weather It was October and the Indians on a remote reservation asked their new Chief if the coming winter was going to be cold or mild. Since he was a Chief in a modern society he had never been taught the old secrets. When he looked at the sky he couldn't tell what the winter was going to be like. Nevertheless, to be on the safe side he told his tribe that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that the members of the village should collect firewood to be prepared.
But being a practical leader, after several days he got an idea. He went to the phone booth, called the National Weather Service and asked, "Is the coming winter going to be cold?"
It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold the meteorologist at the weather service responded.
So the Chief went back to his people and told them to collect even more firewood in order to be prepared. A week later he called the National Weather Service again. Does it still look like it is going to be a very cold winter?
Yes, the man at National Weather Service again replied, it's going to be a very cold winter.
The Chief again went back to his people and ordered them to collect every scrap of firewood they could find. Two weeks later the Chief called the National Weather Service again. Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?
Absolutely, the man replied. It's looking more and more like it is going to be one of the coldest winters ever.
"How can you be so sure?" the Chief asked.
The weatherman replied, "The Indians are collecting firewood like crazy!"
|
| Comment on this Story | Printer Friendly | Send Story to a Friend |
| Sponsor Great coffee tastes even better with a great offer! Try Gevalia now and get 3 boxes of Gevalia coffee for just
$3 with FREE SHIPPING! Order today and you'll receive a
FREE travel mug! There is NO obligation. Keep the gifts even if you don't
continue to enjoy our direct delivery program. GET ALL THIS FOR $3 plus FREE SHIPPING!
Click here... |
| Driving Lesson My teenaged niece Elizabeth was nervous as she took the wheel for her first driving lesson. As she was pulling out of the parking lot, the instructor said, "Turn left here, and don't forget to let the people behind you know what you're doing."
Elizabeth turned to the students sitting in the backseat and announced, "I'm going left." |
| Comment on this Story | Printer Friendly | Send Story to a Friend |
| Choose from 60,000 Books -- Get Your Free Samples at BookDaily.com Be sure to check out one of ArcaMax's hottest features, BookDaily.com!
Browse, search and read sample first chapters from your favorite authors -- and sign up for free email newsletters with the book samples you want to read later.
You'll find books from Lisa Jackson, Tucker Max, Brian Herbert, and many more.
Visit BookDaily.com now.
-- From the ArcaMax editors |
| To see more Jokes, visit the Jokes channel. |
| ArcaMax proudly distributes 75 popular newsletters, including Garfield, Recipes, Bible Verses, Gardening and Business Success. To Subscribe to any of our Newsletters visit:
http://www.arcamax.com/cgi-bin/reg ArcaMax publications are now available in an "advertising-free" format.
Click here for details. We invite you to visit BookDaily: Book Samples for Book Lovers |
| Thank you for your subscription to Jokes from ArcaMax with the following email address:
duncanjax@gmail.com Jokes from ArcaMax may be non-commercially distributed unedited! Please share it! Pass it along to friends, family and associates. SUBSCRIBING To Subscribe to any of our Newsletters visit:
http://www.arcamax.com/cgi-bin/reg UNSUBSCRIBING To discontinue this newsletter - Select this link Having Trouble? You may also try this link:
http://www.arcamax.com/unsubscribe
It is our policy and practice not to send unwanted email. ArcaMax Publishing, Inc.
729 Thimble Shoals Boulevard
Suite B
Newport News, VA 23606 Copyright 1996-2009 ArcaMax Publishing, Inc. All Rights Reserved. All registered trademarks are the property of their respective owners. |
| |
