Boardash: Women for Wednesday October 7, 2009

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Women
For You
Wednesday October 7, 2009

Health and Beauty Tip -- White Eyeliner
CDC: 28 pregnant women dead from H1N1
Annie's Mailbox
Quote of the Day
Decorate for Halloween

Health and Beauty Tip -- White Eyeliner

To brighten up your eyes, use a little shimmery eyeliner in white, pink, or silver on the inner corner of each eye, and blend it in. If you're looking for even more effect, highlight the brow line with the same pencil.

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CDC: 28 pregnant women dead from H1N1

ATLANTA (UPI) -- H1N1 flu has killed 28 pregnant women and sent 100 to intensive-care units in the United States since late August, health officials said Thursday.

Dr. Anne Schuchat, director of the National Center for Immunization and Respiratory Diseases at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, urged pregnant women to get the seasonal flu vaccine and the H1N1 vaccine, which becomes available next week.

"I just want to remind women and doctors and nurse midwives that antiviral medicine can be a very important treatment for pregnant women who have respiratory illness," Schuchat said at a briefing.

The CDC has not tracked seasonal flu complications in pregnancy in the past, she said.

"But," she added, "what we are seeing is quite striking."

Schuchat said Friday's CDC weekly update would show substantial H1N1 flu illness in most of the country.

Across Florida, health officials reported 11 H1N1 deaths were confirmed over the past week and 102 overall since the virus first appeared last April, the (Jacksonville) Florida Times-Union reported.

H1N1 flu claimed the life of a 14-year-old girl in Maryland -- the state's first young casualty from who had no underlying problems, The Baltimore Sun reported.

People with flu-like symptoms, the very old and very young, as well as those with asthma, diabetes or immunosuppression should get anti-viral medications, Schuchat said.

She said people, particular parents, should be on the lookout for warning signs including fast breathing or difficulty breathing, trouble taking fluids, difficulty being awakened or a gray or bluish tint in a child's color.

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Annie's Mailbox

Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar

Dear Annie: I have two adult sons, one married, one divorced. We always had a good relationship, but I hadn't heard from either of them in a while even though they live nearby. I finally phoned and asked what was going on, but they wouldn't tell me. When their father called, however, they came over.

The married one said he has "low self-esteem" and it's my fault. He has a master's degree and a terrific job, has been married 20 years and lives in an expensive home. The other one constantly sought and received our help while going through his divorce, but now says we've "done nothing" for him.

We also have five grandchildren, but only one calls us. Long-time friends are flabbergasted at this situation. Most of them knew us while our kids were growing up. We have no relatives to talk to. What can we do? -- A Hurt Mom and Gran

Dear Hurt: Some children never mature sufficiently to take responsibility for their own lives. It is easier to blame Mom and Dad for whatever problems or unhappiness they have. A child with an expensive home and good job can still have low self-esteem, and self-absorbed children assume their parents never do enough for them. We also can tell you that when siblings get together, the "blame game" can intensify. Parents are not perfect, but still, at this age, it is a form of denial to make you the fall guy. Offer to go with them for counseling to see if you can work through this. In the meantime, occupy your time and your thoughts with other activities that will bring you contentment.

Dear Annie: I love to send out Christmas cards, especially to out-of-town friends and family I rarely see. I feel this is the main function of the cards, to check in and say that though we don't see each other often, I still think of them warmly.

However, a surprising number of my friends argue that if I never see these people and only hear from them at Christmas, it's a waste of time to send them cards. The implication is that if they wanted to stay in touch, they would do so during the rest of the year.

I used to laugh off such comments as Scrooge-like, but I wonder. Does it make sense to send cards and catch-up notes to those I never see? -- Lake City Mark

Dear Mark: We think you are a thoughtful, nice fellow and hope you will continue to send Christmas cards and notes to people you rarely see, provided you enjoy doing so and they enjoy receiving them. You are not obligated to send cards to those who never respond, but you are correct that one of the objectives is to stay in touch, particularly with older relatives who may find it difficult to reciprocate. Bless you for caring enough to do so.

Dear Annie: I felt compelled to respond to the letter from "Missing Mom in Missouri," who worries her recently widowed father may be entering the dating scene too soon.

I was a widow at age 34. I did most of my grieving while my husband was dying of cancer, not after. In fact, we grieved together. This is an intimate aspect to a marriage that children cannot appreciate.

When my husband died, I had already been grieving for six months. It shocked my family and friends when I moved on while they had just started mourning. Some thought I must not have loved my husband, but I know he wanted me to continue with my life. After being surrounded by death for six months, I was exhausted and needed someone to care for me. I also struggled with my own mortality. Nothing better drives home the point that life is short.

I hope that daughter will be supportive. Her father has grieved far more than she knows. -- Happily Remarried in Connecticut

Annie's Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please e-mail your questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or write to: Annie's Mailbox, P.O. Box 118190, Chicago, IL 60611. To find out more about Annie's Mailbox, and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

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Quote of the Day

Harper's Index, October 1989

Estimated amount of glucose used by an adult human brain each day, expressed in M&Ms: 250

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Decorate for Halloween

For Halloween this year, why not turn your front yard into a spooky graveyard to impress the trick-or-treaters? ArcaMax will show you how with our new Halloween Feature.

You can also get simple, inexpensive ways to throw a great Halloween party. Or if you just want something more traditional, read up on how to carve the perfect Jack-O-Lantern.

Visit the Halloween feature today for these tips and more, as well as information on safe trick-or-treating and quick and easy costume ideas.

-- From the ArcaMax editors