Today's Jokes Plus Anti-aging Skin Care You Can Trust

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Bumpers Most people hate to parallel park. The other day, I saw this woman trying to get out of a tight parking space. She'd bump the car in front, then back-up and strike the car behind her. This went on about 2 minutes. I walked over to see if I could somehow help. My offer was declined though. She said, "Why have bumpers if you're not going to use them once in a while?"
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Justice Triumphs A lawyer had a jury trial in a very difficult business case. The client, who had attended the trial, was out of town when the jury came back with its decision, which was for the lawyer and his client. The lawyer immediately sent a telegram to his client, reading, "Justice has triumphed!" The client wired back, "Appeal at once!"
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Student vs. Stock Broker Deciding to take a day off from his important job, a young hot-shot broker went back to visit some of his professors at his old school. Entering the school, he saw a dog attacking a small child. He quickly jumped on the dog and strangled it. The next day, the local paper reported the story with the headline "Valiant Student Saves Boy From Fearsome Dog." The broker called the editor of the paper and strongly suggested that a correction be issued, pointing out that he was no longer a student, but a successful Wall Street broker. The following day, the paper issued a correction, with a headline that read, "Pompous Stock Broker Kills School Mascot."
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The Limo The Pope was getting into his limo one night when he turned to the limo driver and said, "Before I die, I would love to drive this beautiful limo just once." "Well, here," the limo driver says, "Take the wheel, Your Holiness!" Further down the road, the limo is stopped by a policeman who looks in the window, goes back to his squad car, calls dispatch and says, "I just pulled over someone real important and I don't know what to do." "Well, who is it?" his dispatcher says, "The mayor? The governor? The president?" "I don't know," the officer responds, "but the Pope's his chauffer!"
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Choose from 60,000 Books -- Get Your Free Samples at BookDaily.com ArcaMax Publishing has launched the new BookDaily.com! Browse, search and read sample first chapters from your favorite authors -- and sign up for free email newsletters with the book samples you want to read later. You'll find books from Lisa Jackson, Tucker Max, Brian Herbert, and many more. Once you have given the site a look, we welcome any feedback or suggestions. Visit BookDaily.com now. -- From the ArcaMax editors
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