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Making Faces Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms.Smith stopped to gently reprove the child. Smiling sweetly, the Sunday School teacher said, "Johnny, when I was a child, I was told if that I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that." Johnny looked up and replied, "Well, Ms Smith, you can't say you weren't warned."
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Old Smiley On the other side is my favorite jungle resident, Old Smiley, one of the laziest crocodiles in these parts. I do suggest that you keep your hands inside the boat because Smiley is always looking for a hand out. Did you know that crocodiles have remained basically unchanged for the last 20 million years? It's true! And that's just about how long Smiley's been on this river. He doesn't get around much anymore. Usually, he just sort of sits around, waiting for our boats and looking for a hand out.
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Three Bears There were these three bears were out for a drive in a car, when they accidentally drove off a cliff and into a lake. Q: Which bear did not get wet? A: The dribear. Q: Which bear saw the accident? A: The neighbear. Q: Which bear came out of the car safely? A: The surbibear. Q: Which bear fixed the car? A: The Macguybear.
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Spelling Lesson Kurt: I spent eight hours over my new spelling book last night. Teacher: It's wonderful that you spent so much time studying! Kurt: Who said anything about studying? My spelling book was under my bed when I went to sleep!
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Free Parenting Humor from the New Yorker With the new school year starting, parents can use a good laugh to start the day. The New Yorker Parenting Cartoons ezine has just what you need! Subscribers to this free ezine will receive a New Yorker cartoon every morning by e-mail -- a service available only from ArcaMax! New subscribers will also receive a New Yorker-style cartoon with their name in the caption, perfect for sharing with family and friends! For more cartoons every morning, sign up for the Dogs and Cats, Food Humor, Love & Relationships, and Office Humor ezines. Subscribe to New Yorker Parenting Humor. -- From the ArcaMax editors
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