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Today's Jokes Plus Anti-aging Skin Care You Can Trust

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Bumpers Most people hate to parallel park. The other day, I saw this woman trying to get out of a tight parking space. She'd bump the car in front, then back-up and strike the car behind her. This went on about 2 minutes. I walked over to see if I could somehow help. My offer was declined though. She said, "Why have bumpers if you're not going to use them once in a while?"
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Student vs. Stock Broker Deciding to take a day off from his important job, a young hot-shot broker went back to visit some of his professors at his old school. Entering the school, he saw a dog attacking a small child. He quickly jumped on the dog and strangled it. The next day, the local paper reported the story with the headline "Valiant Student Saves Boy From Fearsome Dog." The broker called the editor of the paper and strongly suggested that a correction be issued, pointing out that he was no longer a student, but a successful Wall Street broker. The following day, the paper issued a correction, with a headline that read, "Pompous Stock Broker Kills School Mascot."
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The Limo The Pope was getting into his limo one night when he turned to the limo driver and said, "Before I die, I would love to drive this beautiful limo just once." "Well, here," the limo driver says, "Take the wheel, Your Holiness!" Further down the road, the limo is stopped by a policeman who looks in the window, goes back to his squad car, calls dispatch and says, "I just pulled over someone real important and I don't know what to do." "Well, who is it?" his dispatcher says, "The mayor? The governor? The president?" "I don't know," the officer responds, "but the Pope's his chauffer!"
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Choose from 60,000 Books -- Get Your Free Samples at BookDaily.com ArcaMax Publishing has launched the new BookDaily.com! Browse, search and read sample first chapters from your favorite authors -- and sign up for free email newsletters with the book samples you want to read later. You'll find books from Lisa Jackson, Tucker Max, Brian Herbert, and many more. Once you have given the site a look, we welcome any feedback or suggestions. Visit BookDaily.com now. -- From the ArcaMax editors
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BookDaily Genre Sampler: Romance

(0) Books remaining on Shelf

Romance - General Wednesday September 2, 2009 Welcome ArcaMax reader! Thank you for subscribing to this BookDaily update. As an ArcaMax subscriber, it’s quick and easy to set up a BookDaily.com account and make full use of the site. Just set up a user name and password and you’ll be all set. Click to get started. The Time Traveler's Wife By Audrey Niffenegger ISBN: 9780156029438   THE MAN OUT OF TIME Oh not because happiness exists, that too-hasty profit snatched from approaching loss. But because truly being here is so much; because everything here apparently needs us, this fleeting world, which in some strange way keeps calling to us. Us, the most fleeting of all. ... Ah, but what can we take along into that other realm? Not the art of looking, which is learned so slowly, and nothing that happened here. Nothing. The sufferings, then. And, above all, the heaviness, and the long experience of love,-just what is wholly unsayable. - from The Ninth Duino Elegy, RAINER MARIA RILKE, translated by STEPHEN MITCHELL FIRST DATE, ONE <... Read more     One Touch of Topaz By Iris Johansen ISBN: 9780553593105   “The contact’s code name is Topaz.” Skip Brennen made a face. “Sounds like something from a spy novel, doesn’t it? I feel like I should be wearing a trench coat and carrying a diplomat’s attaché case.” “It’s too damn hot to wear a trench coat.” Fletcher Bronson slapped at a mosquito on his arm. “Hell, it’s too hot to breathe on this forsaken island. I don’t know what I’m doing here, anyway. Those thieving bastards will nationalize my refinery within the next six months no matter what they say now. I should have accepted my losses and not wasted my time coming to St. Pierre.” ... Read more       BookDaily Top Five Mastering the Art of French Cooking, Volume 1 206 Bones (Temperance Brennan Series #12) The Time Traveler's Wife An Echo in the Bone (Outlander Series #7) Pursuit of Honor   Romance - General Top Five The Time Traveler's Wife Twilight One Touch of Topaz Public Secrets Pleasure (Shadowdwellers Series #3)

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Manage Your Subscriptions You are currently subscribed as duncanjax@gmail.com. To unsubscribe from this newsletter, please notify us here or visit https://www.arcamax.com/cgi-bin/custacct. ArcaMax Publishing, Inc., 729 Thimble Shoals Blvd., Suite 1-B, Newport News, VA 23606 | FAX (757) 596-9731 Copyright © 2008 ArcaMax Publishing, Inc. All Rights Reserved. Advertise With Us | Contact the Editor | FAQ/Help ArcaMax Publishing websites: www.arcamax.com (Family-Friendly News & Fun) www.bookdaily.com (Book Samples for Book Lovers) www.arcamundo.com (en español)